2021
2021 has been a very complex year. a year of change. such highs and lows. so. many. feelings. i have never felt so hurt or so loved. so full of joy and full of pain at the same time. this year has been one of the most emotionally challenging years in a very long time. when i made the decision to move out of the house last year, it was one of the most freeing decisions i have ever made. and it was also one of the darkest moments of my life. other than the grief of losing my family members, this ranked right up there as the scariest, one of the most emotional decisions i have ever made. the thing is, it was my decision. it was not my decision to lose my family members but this....moving out and changing the family dynamic was my choice and it was hard. it was harder than hard. the guilt i felt was unreal. but every step forward i made, the knot in my stomach loosened until finally it was gone. rather than spend time recalling the negative that happened, i want to focus on the positive.